Writing Again, Finally

Jim Rohn quote about lifeHere it is, nearly two thirds of the way through the year, and once again I find myself in my usual predicament of not having published anything here for months. You can’t publish what you haven’t written and I haven’t written a darned thing. It is high time to get started again – so here goes.

Once upon a time, on a dark night dreary, a blood red moon illumined the dead and the weary. No, no, no – that’s not what I meant to do. I’m not working on poetry, a novel, or a short story. This is supposed to be just a simple little post to get my writing bones greased up and working again. That’s just kind of how my brain seems to work these days – whatever random thought that’s next in line sends the messages to my fingers and whala! the words get written and I leave them like they are. Speaking of whala, I just looked it up to see if the spelling is correct, and found that the Urban Dictionary says that the word is often “used by morons in an attempt to sound more intelligent than they actually are.” Apparently, now I’m also a moron. Who wudda thunk it?

I guess this is a pretty good start. It’s short and sweet. I’ve accomplished a couple of the objectives that writers try to do but often fail miserably to accomplish – I have taught you something new and I have entertained you beyond your wildest expectations. I should charge money for you to read this.

As Arnold so famously said, “Ahllll be back!” See ya then.

Blogging 101| Introducing Me and “Three” – Part 2

Blogging 101 LogoThe Number Three(s)

To fully understand and appreciate this, you should read Part 1. You can read it here. It’s like serial fiction from the “olden” days, back when I was young and could write more than one paragraph without falling asleep – as I am about to do.

Since publishing the first part of this and now, I had a rethink, and discovered that I shorted myself by two three’s in Part 1. (See what I mean? If you didn’t read Part 1, you don’t have a clue about the three’s, do you?) It turns out, after my rethink, that I am exactly three days behind in this course and exactly three posts behind to get caught up in all the daily assignments. That is two more three’s to add to the existing five, so applying a little math now gives me seven three’s.

Now I know enough from watching television shows on different educational networks and learning a little about gambling over the years to know that seven is a lucky number. So I claimed my luck from the earlier post, but now I am truly claiming my lucky number seven, and all the three’s it took to get there.

Watch Closely, Now!

So now that I have you truly confused, I have you exactly where I want you. In your confusion I have you in a weakened and vulnerable state and I can perform great feats of magic and sleight of hand and mystical feats – so much that you will be overwhelmed with my great talent and be greatly persuaded that you have never read such great writing as you are now.

It’s all in the misdirection.               Look over there, it’s a UFO!!!

See how easy that was.

Now, About That Introduction

This is actually the easy part. Since this is my third attempt to complete this – as I stated earlier, and you would know if you bothered to read Part 1 – but if you didn’t, yes it is true, this is my third try at Blogging 101. It’s not as if it is terribly hard, it’s just I have terrible issues – one being a complete inability to manage my time. So I get a little behind and stressed over being a little behind and then I get a little further behind and stressed over that and get even further behind and even more stressed. Then I quit.

At least that describes my previous two attempts. Not this time, though. Yes, it is true I am a little behind; and yes, I’ll confess to being a little stressed about it. But…this time I am writing until I drop to get caught up.

Three attempts means this is my third time writing an introduction, so I am making this easy. I am “repurposing” the introductions from my first two attempts. Between the two, you will get a pretty good idea of who I am and why I am here.

The “Introduction” links from the previous attempts to complete Blogging 101 are here. First attempt on April 16, 2014. Second attempt on November 14, 2014.

Return of the Toracle

The Toracle Returns
The Toracle Returns

 

My Toracle was very unhappy that I disturbed her with something as trivial as a couple of numbers. Seems she was in a deeply hypnotic mind-meld with her cohort in crime. (She was sleeping, for God’s sake.) She offered no wisdom about the curious transposition of the numbers 135 and 153. She did share some strong advice, though.

Mind meld
Mind meld

Get to work on the important stuff – like paying bills.

 

 

 

 

 

 

He studied the room, looking for the Oracle, but he couldn’t see anyone else in attendance – at least not anyone alive.~Shaun Jeffrey, The Kult